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Hello! Welcome to Pichets in Paris Publishing. Here you will find travel stories and photos, the occasional Book Review and fictional piece based in Paris or France. ALL IMAGES ARE BY L'AUSSIE IMAGES (owned by Denise Covey). Contact me for permission to copy my images.

Friday, July 27, 2012

Love Locked in Paris - a fictional romantic story using the bridge locks in Paris by moi.


It's time for RomanticFridayWriters,. We are a group of writers who post to a theme every second Friday. The stories are generally romantic, but not necessarily 'romance' with a HEA ending. If you're a writer of prose or poetry you are welcome to join up. Visit our dedicated site and read the Submission Guidelines.

I recently posted pictures of a stroll along the Left Bank on this site, and promised a romantic story using the locks. That's one of the reasons I'm posting on my Pichets in Paris blog this challenge. And the reason I've gone all out with my photos...hope you like this Special Edition.

 

Love Locked in Paris

The  most romantic day of my life – Notre Dame's aged bricks and soaring buttresses kissed by sunset – the lock-filled  bridge to the Left Bank – lovers sharing wine.

My candy pink dress with its French Poodle embroidery flared around my knees. Pink satin 4-inch heels complemented my black net stockings. A tiny posy of white roses felt just right.

Mitch, devastatingly handsome in his black suit kissed the ring on my finger – could things get any better?

‘Let’s do it!’ he said.

We walked to our chosen spot midway across the bridge. Mitch reached into his pocket and flipped the copper in his hands.


‘I had it engraved.’

I wrapped my arms around his waist and read – ' Capt'nFlynn, Mastarata  25-June-10’.

'You used our special names!'

We looped the lock over the wire and clicked it shut. A passing tourist took our photo.

‘Let’s come back every year,’ I said.

‘I can’t think of any better way to celebrate our love.’ 





Tragic how the skies were smudgy today, not brilliant like two years ago.

Tragic that my emotions were so raw.


Finally, I found it - bright and shiny in the gloom.

Ironic.

I attached the tiny plastic envelope.

I sobbed for our fractured love.

Darling Mitch

I could have trusted you instead of showering you with jealousy.
I could have travelled with you instead of putting my job first.
I could have forgiven you for your indiscretion instead of throwing you out without listening to you.

Your Dearest Polly

I strolled along the Seine, then ordered mussels in garlic cream sauce at our favourite restaurant in the Latin Quarter.


The 17th Century hotel was not at all romantic without Mitch. Climbing the winding stairs was just a chore.

The door opened before I could turn the key.

‘Mitch! What - ?’

‘Same as you I imagine.’

‘But –‘.

‘I read your letter.’

‘Then you  -‘.

'I saw our photo album.'

'I needed reminding.'

‘I’m sorry sweetheart. It wasn’t you who needed reminding  – it was me. I’ll do better. Will you take me back? I'm so sorry. I love you..’

I twined my arms around his neck and soaked his shirt with my tears.

‘I love you Mitch. I don’t want a life without you.’

His arms felt so right, around me where they belonged – how could it be any better?



©DeniseCovey2012


WORDS: 393
FULL CRITIQUE ACCEPTABLE


If you enjoyed my story and would like to read more, click on the names on the linky below...





20 comments:

  1. This was a beautiful story Denise! You took us up, then down and back up again. Nice

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  2. This was great Denise. And I loved the photos. You conveyed beautiful emotions, that were enhanced, not dependent upon, the photos. I adore the concepts of the engraved locks. How fascinating. And the story was fulfilling and concise.

    Awesome.

    ......dhole

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    Replies
    1. Thanks Donna. I'd like to write a longer story about this. D

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  3. I love Paris. What a great romantic idea that after some ups and downs it was still there. Hope they make it for many years to come.

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  4. Lovely story Denise. I could definitely feel the love. I liked how they were kindred spirits in the end.

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  5. I loved it Denise,i never been to Paris but always know that its a place where love and beauty meet,i felt it through your story through such hearts,thanks for such share,i enjoyed

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  6. Great story Denise and as always a very sensual description of feelings and interaction with the surroundings. Nice twist at the end too. For whatever reason, it took forever for the graphics to load--in fact some of them still haven't loaded. My iMac is only a year old but it is spinning it's wheels on this site tonight.

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  7. Hi,

    Ah Paris. Love lost. Regrets: she had a few. Love regained, and Edith Piaff in the background! I'm sold!

    best
    F

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  8. My dear Denise,
    Before I talk about Paris, first let me say...you are such a romantic (smile)!! I have never been to Paris, but my wife has. Loved the line..."soaked his shirt with my tears". The ending was perfect my friend. You made me smile.

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  9. What a beautiful short story. Paris is just made for lovers I think.

    I have written a real life story see http://www.amazon.co.uk/THE-GREAT-1953-TREK-ebook/dp/B008KK0KHU/ref=pd_ys_iyr1

    Have a great week Diane

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  10. A generous dose of romance on a dull day - here in the UK, weather wise. What could be better, Denise? So romantic...Love-locked in Paris. I saw a news item on the Padlock bridge the other day. Lovely idea and well portrayed here. Glad it all turned out right in the end. Your story is refreshing, given that this week's prompt lent itself to a somewhat pessimistic bent.

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  11. First of August 2012
    Dear Denise,
    Thank you for giving me the address to this lovely post. I have the children this week and I my days have been filled with everything from Barbie-dolls and Nerf-guns to building a loft-bed over my computer-station in my bedroom in order to better make use of the space in my tiny apartment. There are boxes and boxes and more boxes to climb over, and six huge not yet unpacked suitcases from our not so pleasant trip to America. I really need to read lots of happy endings these days!

    I love the atmosphere of your story! Ah Paris! I once travelled to Paris with my grandmother. I don't know what it is like now, but I loved it then.

    What a romantic setting. And what a clever new idea to have engraved padlocks on the fence (instead of graffiti) over the bridge and have your characters get back together because of a letter. The paddocks are related to 'Tie a Yellow Ribbon Around the Old Oak Tree' - except better!

    Warm and romantic happy end. (I am trying to make my story end happily too. I translated it quickly into Swedish for my ten-year-old son, Erik, and he had lots of suggestions as to how to work the children into the story. He wants me to end it with a family picnic in a park! Bless his heart. So far, my story is over 2700 words! It might get to be as long as 4000 words when it's finished.

    I am slow at commenting, but I my goal is to read everyone's post before the next challenge is up. Luckily, this is a fortnightly meme! I need the extra time. As I write this, it is 2.20 am. The children are asleep. (Erik is trying out the loft-bed and is fast asleep directly over my head.)

    We are all still suffering from jet-lag. Hope we get our biological clocks in order before school starts. It usually takes two weeks.

    But you must know all about jet-lag, as much as you travel!

    Take care,
    Hugs & kisses from
    Anna & Co.
    For the benefit of other readers:
    Three things I could have done better

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  12. Thanks for coming by Anna. I'm sorry to hear your trip to the US wasn't so good. Hope you and the children are all settled soon. Tripping over boxes is no fun. D.

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  13. As many times as I've been to Paris, I've never walked down the lock-filled bridge. I really need to fix that, lol. Anyway, you've done a great job describing the setting that it felt like I was there. Nice job on this short story, I really enjoyed the read. (:

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  14. Wonderful story. You grabbed me!

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  15. Aha! So was part of this inspired by real life??? Have a wonderful time in Paris this December!!!!!

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  16. This was so sweet! I'm so glad it "ended" well and that they could go on and enjoy their time in Paris together, again! Lisa @ http://www.lisabuiecollard.com

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